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02 February 2014
Round 7

Round 7 is upon us and the weather is still kindly apart from a stiff breeze mainly hitting the far bank that couldn’t make up its mind just what direction to blow from!  Unfortunately three short today but at least the sections balanced.  Best wishes to Mrs S.  All the lads wish you a speedy recovery from the recent hip operation and hope you are back playing football soon.  We can hope for that but there’s nothing we can do for you about Roger!!  

Ready for the draw at 8.30 and Three Turds Thommo does the business for me and Eric; 15A for me and 28 for Eric.  Then he takes his peg next and lifts out 22.  The smile that invaded his face will need surgery to remove it!  Young Thommo then draws 13 and together they make up two thirds of a team with Chippie, who is on 6.  Of the other league front runners Ryan draws 11 (with no 10 or 12 in the hat), Paul draws 21 but The Knacker Tapper is missing today as he has to work. 

Byron draws 18 and is happy with his lot; well as happy as Byron can be, which is pretty darn miserable in most books!!!

Match starts at 10 and bombs fly out from all directions (except peg 18) as everyone looks for a carp but a lot of nothing happens and continues not to happen for quite a while.  I get one bang on the tip (rod tip silly) but that’s all.  Squirrel (15) comes off the bomb within half an hour but Ben (16) is persisting all day (must be the drink) and I stick it for an hour. 

Hey up!  Less than half an hour in and Elvis on peg 28 hooks a carp on his silver line and feels ALL SHOOK UP as it took him completely by surprise.  His ears are being bent by Gary (23) and 2E (2) both offering advice on how to land/lose etc., but he could do with A LITTLE LESS CONVERSATION so he can concentrate!  Oh how he wants to see THE WONDER OF YOU – an unexpected carp from peg 28 lying in his net and decides, IT’S NOW OR NEVER, and starts to ship back slowly.  He breaks down (not literally) but then has to hastily reconnect his pole as the fish takes off for the middles of the lake but it’s a case of RETURN TO SENDER as the carp slips his hook.  Elvis is distraught and is in his own HEARTBREAK HOTEL left to think on what might have been.  “That fish was ALWAYS ON MIND after that” he said!!

An hour in and 3TT’s tip has not moved despite searching around and trying various baits.  “I nearly s..t myself” he said “waiting for the first bite that I thought just wouldn’t come.  But thanks to my sponsor I wasn’t worried about unwanted lodgers in my pants as I had used a Number 3 Rod and Syphon about 7 AM, before leaving the house, and had a good clear out”.  First bite finally came at 11.10 AM and there was no looking back from then on.

Seeing 3TT’s success Gary chucked a bomb out from 23.  Tip goes round, fish on.  “Section winner” shouts Byron (who only had a couple of pounds!!!!).  “Byron it’s only a skimmer” says Gary.  “Section winner” repeats Byron.  “Byron, it is only a skimmer” says an exasperated Gary.  2E steps in at this point to explain to Gary that his mouth is set horizontally too high for Byron’s ears.  “He’s too small” says 2E, “whatever you say goes right over his head.  Try talking down towards the water – that should do it”.  Finally the message gets home! (see my website under TECHNICAL INFORMATION for an explanation of how this would work).

The match goes on with most concentrating on catching silvers as the carp aren’t really playing – except on peg 22.  Big Martin has had one on the tip but is catching on his pole line.  With an hour to go he goes back on the bomb and catches another.  He goes back on his pole line and catches another.  He goes back on the bomb and, you guessed it, he catches another.

Time called at 3.  Match winner and winner of section A is, surprise, surprise, Dave T with 38lbs 8oz from peg 22.  Big Martin takes second in A and the match with 30lbs 8oz from peg 4.  Craig wins section B with 18lbs 6oz and a mighty chuffed Andy Scott takes second with just shy of 16lbs of silvers – and he “ounced” Byron into third in section!  Section C was won by Mick Webb with 18 1/2lbs of silvers pushing Ryan into second spot.  There were a lot of other double figure silver nets but best coming from 2E with 22lbs 2oz from peg 2. 

The team competition was split as two teams tied on 8 points, the Thomson Twins and Chippie versus Big Martin, Byron and Paul but the latter took the honours on weight by 11oz!!! In the after match interview Dave “Three Turds” Thomson dedicated his win to his new sponsor, Dyno Rod.  “They will be well pleased with this result” he said “and it means so much for me to be able to sit on my box for the entire match (except when needing a pee) and not have to run for the Portaloo every half hour.  The rodding and suction syphon certainly saw me well drained”.

The league is now taking more shape with six definite front runners but Craig is out in front on 9 points.  The default prizes for best cumulative weights of silvers and carp are currently being contested by Byron and 2E (silvers) and Alan and Geoff (carp) but it could be all change after the last two matches.

Next match 16th February.  See you all then

Des

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