John Bruce
This man is a serious mischief maker and is wanted alive or alive.
Last seen somewhere in Dingwall pretending to be a football player and offending all fashion sensibilities. Has also been seen somewhere in the Southern Hemisphere attempting to show his strength by pushing a lamp post over whilst wearing a very bizarre ensemble -PINK TROUSERS. Last seen swimming away after falling over himself.
If he tells you he has a silver shiny trophy be aware as he probably knicked it.
