Saturday 28th October Old Westminster II's 1-5 OH (Nichols 3, Vellosa, Kilsby) With both teams aware of what was at stake - prime position in the table - it was little wonder that this 'football match' turned into something far more sinister. But what ensued was something we all hoped had been eradicated from the game. It was a black day for football. A top referee had been brought in - the league clearly aware that tensions might be running high - but he was powerless with so many hard men of English football on the pitch at one time. Initially, nerves seemed to keep the players' aggression at bay, and the first twenty minutes saw the home side dominate, OH grateful to Shuey 'Tyler Durden' Huq in goal on several occasions. But then chaos descended on Chiswick fields. A series of bone-crunching challenges incredibly escaped the notice of the referee - and Vellosa had had enough. His trademark slide with one leg, swivel with the other, resulted in the inevitable felling of one unlucky Westminster midfielder. It was the call to arms that the mighty OH had been waiting for. Piling in from all angles, punches being thrown, terrible language being deployed, it was like a scene from Dead Poets Society - these boys knew how to get stuck in. The ref, finally showing the good sense that his reputation promised, decided not to brandish any yellow cards - not even to Jameson for his verbal tirade against his opposite number: 'isn't it about time you started acting like a captain?' he barked, foaming at the mouth. By this stage, smelling blood, OH had become men possessed. The tide had tuned, mere anarchy was loosed upon the world (you like that Glenn?), and the result was inevitable. A glorious hat-trick from Nicholls, a sterling performance from Robbie 'Savage' Vellosa, and determination from the entire team, ensured that this top-of-the-table clash was as much rout as riot. Amongst all the controversy, it seems likely that one talking point could turn into a protracted dispute between the management and loose cannon Vellosa. Was it his goal or an own goal? With Vellosa threatening to walk out, we'd like tou know your views. Why don't you make your opinion heard on the 'Your Shout' section. Speak now or forever hold your peace. What the keymen said: Nichols: "After woeful finishing last week noone expected to stick 5 in this week, especially with Reidy Jnr. proclaiming he couldnt possibly head the ball after his exploits the previous night. Shuey kept us in it for the first 20, during which i was suffering from what the travelling fans would call 'the touch of a rapist'. The opening goal came after a forray into the heart of the opposition defence by big man Jameson caused havoc and created the space for me to knock the ball over the defender before drilling the ball into the far corner. The second did nothing to dispel the rumours of disharmony in the camp as Jones ignored the lurking Reidy to centre for me to finish from 6 yards. From then on we were comfortable, especially as the game got more physical after a petulant kick from the usually serene Keen Machine sparked a mass brawl on the half way line. Three goals in the 2nd half was the least we deserved as i completed my hattrick with a diving shoulder following a special Vellosa cross. A furious Shuey was inconsolable all evening after he quite literally threw away a clean sheet bonus and man of the match award straight to the feet of the on rushing forward." Kilsby: "Cracking win on saturday - shockwaves have been sent through the Arthurian League Div 2! My goal wasn't the best you've never seen but we might as well exaggerate a little bit. A cross came in from the left which their Monty Panesar lookalike keeper flapped straight into my path 8 yards out at the far post. I brought it down on my left foot with the calmness of Dennis Bergkamp against Argentina in the 1998 world cup and fired it home Le Tissier-like on the half volley with my right, putting enough power and swerve on the ball to avoid the defender on the line and, more importantly, your brother - who I could sense was itching to get a touch on it and steal the goal from me. Unlucky son! Now I'm off the mark for the season I'm strongly backing myself for a charge up the top scorers board to put myself in with a shout at the golden boot." Jameson: "Good to see Tom Nichols fire home a delightful hatrick. Like Mourinho and Schevchenko, I thought to myself I can now substitute him. Overall, it was a great team effort and certainly the most complete performance all round. John Glenn appears to be the next Tom Cloke in the making with a lovely knee high, fat challenge. Schuey turned in another good performance in nets. He did however see fit to throw it to their striker providing him with an easy tap in. His only explanation was that he was looking for Keen. Keen wasn't found. Vellosa was involved in some comedy girly handbag moments. My favourite was when we watched him throw the ball in the face off their number 15. Smudger had been quite happily skipping along with and holding the hand of number 15 for 20 metres before the striker fell over. Upon getting up, he promptly received the ball in his face from the Vellosa raptor. Comedy." Jones: "Wicked game, John put in some absolutely huge reducers but special praise reserved for Rob who when netted ran back to our half shouting words something like 'that's how you f**king do it number 6, you s**t c**t'." Vellosa: Didn’t attend the post-match press conference (as yet), word is he’s checked himself into an anger management course in preparation for next weeks game!