‘So Far So Good’….‘Spinning Beauty’…..They’re Listening……And There’s GOOD STUFF Here Too…. A Bit Of a Lark….

by Bernie Bell - 09:28 on 03 June 2023

‘So Far So Good’….

I’m posting this…


…simply because there is so much GOOD STUFF  in it in so many ways.


‘Spinning Beauty’…..

Only Bartholomew Barker would balance the movements of celestial bodies with the movements of a pole-dancer – and he does it so well…..

Spinning Beauty

Watching her
I am reminded
Of my first love

She glides graceful
Across the stage
Until captured
by gravity's pole

Revolving 'round
Delicately balanced
Familiar phases
Cast in strobe light

Rotating on her axis
She traces deferents
With high heels
Casting epicycles

Her heavenly body
Evokes celestial law
Oh to be the cylinder
At the center of her universe


I know at least one Astronomer who will appreciate/enjoy this one.


They’re Listening….

I wouldn’t have one in the house…


I previously wrote this in m’blog…..

“A Short Witter about AI…..

Having posted this article as the ‘one I made earlier’ to my last blog... https://theorkneynews.scot/2019/06/20/artificial-intelligence/, set me off thinking about AI again…

We recently  went for a cuppa with someone we know who has a Siri…  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siri  in his kitchen. A little, innocuous looking round thing in the corner - lurking – waiting for us to speak the magic words …’Hey Siri’. 

I’d never come across one in real-life – the telly adverts always make me wonder why anyone would let a thing like that into their house.   Siri’s owner – if that’s the right word -  showed us what it can do – playing music on demand – Zeppelin’s ‘Whole Lotta Love’ straight away – right there – filling the room.  Can’t complain about that! 

Then ….‘What is the weather doing in Stromness today?’  A human might have answered – stick your head out the door and find out. 

The music idea was appealing but I like to look along the rows of C.D.’s (yes, we still play C.D.’s) and choose what I feel like listening to -  a whole album, the older ones carefully put together in a play-list by the artist. https://theorkneynews.scot/2020/07/10/c-d-s/

We got talking about different aspects of Siri – I asked how it is with accents.  I have a Yorkshire accent, and the number of times I have to ‘talk posh’ to get a word recognized on automated telephone do-da’s.  Talking Yorkshire I say ‘Wun’  - the goddam machine makes me turn into someone I’m not and say ‘Wan’. 

I was reminded of the ‘Big Bang Theory’ episode where Raj has a crush on Siri …….how close is it to reality for some folk?  Comedy works best when it’s recognizable – nearly real….. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GvItvuujh8

And, the idea that  ‘s/he’ will comply with anything you want…v. questionable…..  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-SVvtxHJGU

Trouble is – Raj can’t talk to women – so he can’t talk to Siri when she ‘comes out of the ‘phone’ - Eh??????????

I didn’t like it – it gave me the creps, Luddite that I am.   Later, I wished that I’d thought to ask …”Siri – how do you feel today?”.  What happens if someone does that?  Does it blow a gasket?  Or does it say ….”I’m fine thank you, how are you?” …..which would be even more creepy.

I couldn’t help feeling that it was….listening.

That might be because ...it is.”


And There’s GOOD STUFF Here Too….


Reminds me of  ‘I Wish I Was in Glasgow’ by Billy Connolly…..

“Oh I wish I was in Glasgow
With some good old friends of mine,
Some good old rough companions
And some good old smooth red wine.
We could talk about the old days
And the old town's sad decline
And drink to the boys on the road.

Oh I was born in Glasgow
Near the centre of the town.
I would take you there and show you
But they've torn the building down,
And when I think about it
It always makes me frown
They bulldozed it all to make a road.

And that great old place I miss so much
Has seen much better days,
And still we talk about it
As we go our separate ways.
Oh but Glasgow gave me more
Than it ever took away
And prepared me for life on the road.

My granny was a cleaner,
My grandad drove a tram,
My father an engineer,
Made me all I am.
They have seen the city come and go,
Still they give a damn.
There's so much to learn along the road.

And Glasgow gave me more
Than it ever took away
And prepared me for life on the road.”



A Bit Of a Lark….


Take heed, Councils everywhere!!!


Here’s one I made earlier….https://theorkneynews.scot/2021/11/03/the-fest-may-be-over-but-heres-more-about-brochs/


Comment from Bernie Bell at 17:36 on 03 June 2023.
I sent Bartholomew’s poem my chum Eamonn Keyes, who said…

“Beautiful comparative words and imagery and timely for me, as I’m currently writing and recording the title track for one of the 2 CDs I hope to release this year, ‘A Beginner’s Guide To Chaos’, a tongue in cheek song which brings the theory of cosmic chaos to a band’s hopeless attempts to achieve stardom. It may be vaguely autobiographical.”

Poetical astronomers…musical astronomers – all aspects of awareness and appreciation.

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