Who hasn't come across one of those letters from a far flung land where people are encouraged to part with their money or pledge support to a Spellcaster or similar who will at a stroke turn their lives around and grant them their heart's desire? Who wouldn't be seduced by the chance to change their lives by no effort of their own other than letting a mystic, a guru or even a lottery ticket make the changes for them?
I was extremely sceptical until I tried it out myself. But it worked for me, although I have to say the cost to my soul was grievous. The following is the story, but avoid it if easily offended.
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My Dear friends online,
My name is Stan and i live in UK, Neeth.
I have to give this miraculous testimony, which is so unbelievable until now. I had an online problem first with Goldiefish luvver 2 years ago which lead to words exchanged over time. I woz called prat and others and me called things like crankies, moronic, loser, idiots and big-guts (don't know belly size but hey, wot does truth matter). And all us Crankies made sure they gave Goldiefishman peace of mind as well cos he loved therapy like that.
But I was not myself with this affrunt as I lost a great deel of sleep due to larfing too much. I couldn't eat properly as every time Goldiefish Man came into my mind my belly hurt with mirth. Then a close friend of mine told me about a Spellcaster who helped her with a problem about turning orange in the winter. This Spellcaster deal in other problems too. His name is Lord of Neef.
I email the Spellcaster and I told him my problem and I did what he asked of me, to cut the long story short. All he wanted was for me to put big X against anyfing that said Welsh Labour on a paper in May. Before I knew what was happening, less than three days and the Editor of Ferret had brought in Red Card system, no f*cking messing about! And I won lottery as well, plus wife rediscovered her mojo, if you know what i meen. I am now very happy and contented man. Now the goldiefish lover no longer write in making smartyass comments cos red card means he frew toys out of pram. Thanks and prayers to Lord of Neef for helping out and making all this possible.
If you are interested to contact the great Spellcaster, email address: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (Ed: names and numbers deleted in case anyone dull enough to contact)
The Spellcaster, he also specialize on all kind of spell such as:
KEEP WARM SPELL, GET PHOTO TAKEN WITH SOMEONE FAMOUS SPELL, KEEP SOMERSET LEVELS DRY SPELL, INVEST IN AFRICA SPELL, ABOLISH THE HOUSE OF LORDS SPELL (complete rip-off), SPELL RIGHT SPELL (though not shure if that one works), REMAIN IN SPELL (not shure if that one will work either. Hopefully not.)
No matter wot your problem, this Spellcaster will have solution for it. And all it will cost you is an "X". In the right place of course.
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Note: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. So there.
