MISSING

£50 REWARD - FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE WHEREABOUTS OF MISSING DONKEY

DATE OF BIRTH:    UNKNOWN
WEIGHT:    150 KG
HEIGHT:   11 HANDS
HAIR:   BROWN
EYES:   HAZEL
SKIN:   FURRY
BUILD:   HEAVY
GENDER:   MALE

THE DONKEY WAS LAST SEEN WEARING A RED ROSETTE IN A FIELD AT YNYSARWED NEAR ABERDULAIS AND HAS NOT RETURNED TO ITS PASTURES SINCE THE TORY SPRING. POLICE ARE CONCERNED THE OLD PLODDER MAY HAVE BEEN LURED AWAY TO A FATE UNKNOWN BY PROMISES MADE BY FARMER ED, WHO HAS ALSO MYSTERIOUSLY DISAPPEARED.

ANYONE WITH INFORMATION CAN CONTACT NEATH POLICE STATION, OR CRIMESTOPPERS ON 0800 555 111

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UPDATE: 29 NOVEMBER 2015

THANKS TO THE GENEROUS HELP OF THE PUBLIC IT IS BELIEVED THE DONKEY HAS BEEN TRACED. IT HAS EVIDENTLY UNDERGONE A TRAUMATIC TIME SINCE LAST SPRING AND IS BADLY IN NEED OF A WASH AND A HAIRCUT, BUT GOOD TO SEE IT'S BEING CARED FOR BY THE NEW MP FOR NEATH (OR AT LEAST SOMEONE IMPERSONATING HER).

(My thanks to the photographer).

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